Wednesday, 21 January 2015

Going against the expected

The highlight of my day - definitely realising it was pointless attempting to drive to York today and therefore going against the expected. I have begun to think now that what most expect of me is to conform, to some degree, to what is expected. It is me, 'Tanya', of course I will have completed this/be on time/not forget. Of course my eye will be meticulously on the ball. So if I dare rather gloriously say 'fuck it', on the occasion I do, there is a chance it may come as quite a surprise. Well, it was not quite so righteously. It did take the best part of an hour to get from one side of town in the car back to my house so I suspect getting to York would have taken much longer. Also my car spectacularly skidded a good few times and I am fortunate enough to have very understanding bosses so I took the morning at home to attempt to look at the essay criteria for my next assignment.

I haven't quite worked out if I feel a little guilty for going against the expected and taking the morning off. Nonetheless I am still shattered now we've reached the evening. I read something this evening which said 'we overestimate what we can do in a single day yet underestimate what we can do with our lives'. I think this really speaks the truth to me. If only we were not so afraid of what could be - of our potential. I think sometimes it is not the failing that frightens us, but the power that comes with the mere possibility that we might succeed.

I must now send a couple of quick emails and hopefully get some rest before tomorrow.. A couple of pictures taken this morning must be shared before I sign off...

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