Two doors close, one door opens... at least in terms of securing a clinical placement that is. Of course there are almost an infinite number of doors available to us in many areas of life, placement opportunities included. After sending numerous emails, CV's, and applications, and attending two interviews already, both of which politely turned me down, it's safe to say that I was beginning to feel I may be facing an uphill struggle. That, combined with somewhat perfectionist standards and a frustrating self-perceived inability to allow the inner-critic to quieten down meant that my brain was working overtime in order to contain all the worries that went alongside what might be viewed as an ordinary task of ease and patience; finding a placement.
However, doors do close; sometimes quietly and gently, and sometimes because we use our free choice and autonomy, deciding to close the door at least temporarily for the time-being. But some doors close abruptly in a rather unexpected and loud manner; not to say they won't open again, and certainly not because of the 'terrible and completely unworthy' person you are, contrary to what the inner-critic might convince you to believe. So, needless to say, when I was offered a position as a trainee counsellor at one of the best placements (for me) I could have hoped for, my entire being was restored with all the enthusiasm I was fighting to maintain. I had an interview yesterday morning and was offered a position within hours.. I am now really, really looking forward to this new adventure, to the first year of my training, discovering what lies ahead, and hopefully opening many more doors.