This week was indeed the beginning of many more to come. I'm more than glad it's Saturday. I plan on watching Grey's Anatomy, going to the gym and doing a little yoga, baking, doing some jobs in town, and then celebrating two of my friends birthdays this evening. I am glad there is time to rest today because it feels like I'm coming down with a cold and there's no time to get colds.
Alongside sorting out some things in the house, trying to find a third job, and over-thinking life's most uncontrollable things, I somehow found my mind searching for acceptance of the fact that things will work out, I just don't know exactly how just yet.. I went back into model mode and did a show too. I always find that each day as a model can be vastly different to the one before and the one afterwards but there comes a point where you realise that that's never going to change; either embrace it or be forever fighting it. You don't know what you're waking up to, and you certainly can't predict who you will be with, what's going to be required, and when your boyfriend asks what time you'll be finished, you don't even have an answer because you simply don't know. You turn up, you don't know what you look like, you don't know who your dresser is, you don't know what time the show(s) are, and you don't even remember what your looks are because you tried on so many. A lot of unknowns! And yet it does work out eventually. Things fall into place and somehow it just works. It has to work... and even if it doesn't, the world won't just stop turning round.
Like I wrote above - it's similar to over-thinking and worrying. Sometimes it does no good.. if you find the acceptance (or the trust) that it will be OK, chances are, it will be OK. And if the process can be enjoyed, then that's just the cherry on top.