Tuesday, 18 June 2013

new happenings

Life seems to be happening. This is a really busy week - so much to do/'sort out'. I have a fitting later this afternoon for a show this week and many things to tick off my to-do list in the meantime, yet for some reason I find myself blogging instead. I suppose this is the beauty of non-academic related to-do lists and deadlines; my time is unusually flexible and yes - I can blog at 11.35am. I seem to be on the train to here there and everywhere for work or castings or other non-work related trips, whilst simultaneously still on my mission to secure some form of permanent work so that I feel more comfortable planning my post grad study knowing I will have sufficient funds available to support me.

Modelling, as I always say, is fine.. And perhaps it is enough. Or perhaps it would be enough if I was taller/thinner/better hair/more beautiful, etc... (says the ever present inner-critic) But regardless of these personal and unalterable factors, it does not feel enough. As the case may be, my head might be finally catching up with my heart; perhaps years of working in an industry in which at times, feeling like you never measure up is the one and only motivator to both give up entirely and push forward because the only way to 'do' better is to 'be' better. (or so we think...) Perhaps this is why now, more-so than ever, I'm pushing for something different. On the other hand, the instability and uncertainty of this way of living might also be a factor. Regardless, even financial considerations disregarded, for my own fulfillment and sanity, my soul needs more too.

So here I am, booking jobs, taking up numerous new projects, beginning writing work very soon, re-igniting a running and yoga regime and reconnecting with friends and family when time permits. I am also researching into possible partial funding for my post grad study whilst emailing some potential professional placement options for my very first trainee therapist position. Very exciting and new adventures happening...

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